I'm Puttin' Out My Roses for Free
I have noticed that a lot of famous bloggers seem to have either,
1. Somebody or something famous that they absolutely despise, or
2. Somebody or something famous that they absolutely LOVE
Since I already have number one under control (yes, that was a reference to you Atoosa) I think it could only help to acquire number two as well.
But the problem is, I can't think of any celebrity that I am in love with. I don't know any of them, and I tend to fall in love with people based on how they feel about me first- which makes this kind of an impossible situation.
Thankfully, it is not in my nature to give up very easily, so naturally I have devised a plan to take care of this problem. I will now introduce a new segment, called:
Celebrity Bachelorette - published here every Tuesday evening.
The concept is simple. It will be the literary version of ABC's 'The Bachelorette', except much, much better. Because in my version, the 25 men will all be celebrity males... competing for me. Each week, based on fabricated scenario-dates I will have with them, some will be eliminated, until there is only one left. One left to be my Official Celebrity Crush.
Here are the 25 (single that I know of) Celebrities that have made the First Round of the competition:
1. Joaquin Phoenix
2. Adrian Brody
3. Ewen McGregor
4. Ben McKenzie
5. Philip Seymour-Hoffman
6. Jake Gyllenhall
7. Tobey Maguire
8. Keanu Reeves
9. James Franco
10. George Clooney (in attempt to steal him from Miss Snark)
11. David Gray
12. Michael Vartan
13. Jude Law
14. Colin Farrell
15. Hugh Grant
16. Charlie Sheen
17. Kanye West
18. Jimmy Fallon
19. James Blunt
20. Terrance Howard
21. Leonardo DiCaprio
22. Colin Hanks (son of Tom Hanks)
23. Joshua Jackson
24. Jesse McCartney (his agent begged me)
25. Simon Cowell
Okay, that's the list. Watch out for tonight's upcoming episode, the Season Premiere of, Celebrity Bachelorette.
Every Tuesday evening, on your trusty network- Pirate Val.
posted by Pirate Val at 17:47
3 Comments:
That is a most fabulous idea!
In answer to the comment as left on my little blog, I AM a Pirate, but a Pirate of the Aliceius Wonderlandia variety, and as such have not yet spent nearly enough time on the water pillaging things. I could have been Sarah the Alice, but that wouldn't have made sense to anybody but me, and possibly some magicians living in and around Sussex, who probably wouldn't have the Internet anyways.
I soon hope to remedy the missing Pirate aspects of my Piratedom, however, I'm just searching for my particular niche in the gallant thieving and swashbuckling world. After all, it's not like I've joined the Pirating guild just for the hat or something.
I am currently awaiting the imminent loss of one of my less needed limbs. I am desperately hoping for a peg leg.
And, lest I forget, rather than a Parrot on my shoulder I am often seen with a cat instead. I could be the first Pirate Cat Lady, wherein I ransack the Spanish Armada for gold and Whiskas.
At any rate, you have a wonderful blog. Welcome to the world of blogging!
Hey, thanks for the comment. I like the concept. And I think Ewan is married, Philip has a girlfriend and Tobey is engaged.
Oh and I LOVE trashy magazines. Although I prefer Cosmo Girl over Seventeen. It's more peppy and stereotypically girly.
I have never been a pirate. What can i do?
V.
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